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Writing Examples

See strong and weak examples of narrative, persuasive, and expository writing. Learn what selective school markers look for.

3 Writing StylesStrong & Weak ExamplesCommon Mistakes

Quick Comparison

Writing StylePurposeKey Features
📖 NarrativeTell a storyCharacters, plot, sensory details, dialogue
💬 PersuasiveConvince the readerClear argument, evidence, counter-arguments
📝 ExpositoryExplain or teachFacts, logical order, clear information
📖

Narrative Writing

Tell a story with characters, a setting, and a plot that engages your reader.

What Markers Look For:

NSW markers want to see creativity, vivid descriptions that make your reader feel like they're right there in the story, and a clear beginning, middle, and end. They're looking for characters who feel real, sensory details that bring the scene to life, and a story that flows naturally.

Tips for Success:

  • Create interesting characters that readers can connect with
  • Use descriptive words to paint a picture (show, don't tell!)
  • Make sure your story has a problem and a solution
  • Include dialogue to bring your characters to life
  • Use sensory details (what you see, hear, smell, touch, taste)

Strong Narrative Example

The library door creaked open, and Maya stepped inside, her heart pounding. She'd avoided this place for weeks, ever since the incident with the overdue books that had cost her library privileges. Today was different. She needed that marine biology book for her project, the one that could help her understand why the dolphins at the aquarium behaved so strangely. "Can I help you?" The librarian's voice was warm, not accusatory like Maya had feared. She clutched her library card tighter. "I... I'm looking for a book about dolphins," Maya managed, her voice barely above a whisper. The librarian smiled and gestured toward the natural sciences section. As Maya followed, she noticed the afternoon sunlight streaming through the tall windows, painting golden rectangles on the polished floor. Maybe coming back wasn't going to be as terrible as she'd imagined. By the time she left, the book tucked safely under her arm, Maya realized something important: facing what you're afraid of often turns out to be easier than running from it.

Why This Works:

✓ Strong opening that creates immediate interest

✓ Vivid sensory details (creaking door, golden sunlight, polished floor)

✓ Clear character emotions and development

✓ Natural dialogue that reveals character

✓ Well-structured: problem → action → resolution

✓ Meaningful ending with character growth

Weak Narrative Example

I went to the library. I was nervous. I needed a book about dolphins. The librarian was nice. She showed me where the books were. I got the book I needed. Then I left. I felt better. I learned that it's good to face your fears.

Problems to Avoid:

✗ No vivid descriptions or sensory details

✗ Telling instead of showing emotions

✗ No dialogue to bring characters to life

✗ Choppy sentences with no variety

✗ Vague and rushed without building tension

✗ States the lesson directly instead of showing character growth

💬

Persuasive Writing

Convince your reader to agree with your opinion using strong reasons and evidence.

What Markers Look For:

Markers look for strong reasons backed up with examples, a clear argument throughout your writing, and the ability to change someone's mind or get them to take action. They want to see you acknowledge different viewpoints and counter them effectively.

Tips for Success:

  • Start with a clear statement of what you believe
  • Give at least 3 strong reasons with specific examples
  • Think about what someone who disagrees might say, then prove them wrong
  • Use facts, statistics, or real-world examples to support your points
  • End with a powerful conclusion that reminds readers of your main point

Strong Persuasive Example

Schools should extend recess from 20 minutes to 40 minutes, and the evidence is clear. First, longer recess improves academic performance. A study from the American Academy of Pediatrics found that students who had more recess time showed better focus and higher test scores. After sitting through lessons, our brains need time to reset. Twenty minutes barely gives us time to eat lunch, let alone truly relax and recharge. Second, extended recess promotes physical health. Childhood obesity is a growing concern in Australia, with nearly one in four children overweight. Those extra 20 minutes would allow students to engage in more active play: running, playing sports, or simply moving around, rather than rushing through lunch. Some argue that longer recess means less learning time. However, countries like Finland, which consistently ranks among the world's best education systems, schedule 75 minutes of recess daily. Their students outperform ours despite "losing" instructional time, proving that breaks enhance rather than hinder learning. The choice is clear: forty minutes of recess means healthier, happier, more focused students. Our school should implement this change immediately.

Why This Works:

✓ Clear thesis statement in opening

✓ Three distinct reasons with specific evidence

✓ Uses facts and real-world examples (AAP study, Finland)

✓ Acknowledges counter-argument and refutes it effectively

✓ Strong conclusion with call to action

✓ Maintains persuasive tone throughout

Weak Persuasive Example

I think recess should be longer because it's fun. Everyone likes recess because we can play with our friends. It's boring to sit in class all day. Some people might not agree but they are wrong. Recess is the best part of school. We should have more of it. The end.

Problems to Avoid:

✗ Opinion stated but no clear thesis

✗ Reasons are vague and opinion-based ('it's fun', 'it's boring')

✗ No specific examples or evidence provided

✗ Dismisses opposing views without explanation

✗ Weak, abrupt conclusion with no real impact

✗ Informal tone that undermines credibility

📝

Expository Writing

Explain or teach something to your reader in a clear, organized way.

What Markers Look For:

Markers want clear information, facts, and good organization. Imagine you're helping someone understand something new. Your job is to make it easy and interesting to learn about. They're looking for logical structure, accurate information, and explanations that build understanding step by step.

Tips for Success:

  • Start by introducing your topic clearly
  • Break your explanation into logical sections or steps
  • Use facts, examples, and details to help explain
  • Make sure each paragraph focuses on one main idea
  • Stay focused on explaining rather than persuading

Strong Expository Example

Photosynthesis is the process by which plants create their own food, and understanding it reveals why plants are essential to all life on Earth. The process occurs primarily in plant leaves, which contain millions of tiny green structures called chloroplasts. These chloroplasts hold chlorophyll, the pigment that gives plants their green colour and captures energy from sunlight. This light energy is the key ingredient that makes the entire process possible. During photosynthesis, plants absorb carbon dioxide from the air through tiny pores called stomata. At the same time, their roots draw water from the soil. Inside the chloroplasts, the captured sunlight energy transforms these simple ingredients (carbon dioxide and water) into glucose (a type of sugar) and oxygen. The plant uses glucose as food for growth and energy, while releasing the oxygen into the air as a by-product. This oxygen release is crucial for humans and animals, who need oxygen to breathe. In fact, the vast majority of Earth's oxygen comes from photosynthesis performed by plants and ocean-dwelling algae. Without this process, our planet would have no oxygen-rich atmosphere, making complex life impossible. Understanding photosynthesis helps us appreciate why protecting plant life and forests matters so deeply. They're not just beautiful, they're fundamental to our survival.

Why This Works:

✓ Clear topic introduction in first sentence

✓ Logical organization (what → where → how → why it matters)

✓ Uses specific facts and scientific terminology appropriately

✓ Each paragraph focuses on one main idea

✓ Examples help clarify complex concepts

✓ Maintains objective, informative tone throughout

Weak Expository Example

Photosynthesis is when plants make food. It happens in leaves. They use sun and water and air. Then they make oxygen. Plants are green because of chlorophyll. This is important. We need oxygen to breathe. Plants are good. That's why we should plant more trees.

Problems to Avoid:

✗ Oversimplified explanations that lack depth

✗ No clear organizational structure

✗ Missing key details and scientific accuracy

✗ Random facts without connecting them logically

✗ Too brief - doesn't fully explain the process

✗ Shifts to persuasion at the end instead of staying expository

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